Heartwings Love Notes Kitchen Helps and Hints

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Heartwings says, “Good tools are an important part of success in the kitchen.”

When at around the age of ten or eleven I first began to cook, I was permitted only to make brownies. In a year or more, I graduated to salads. That was it. My mother feared I would “ruin the food,” her words, and although cooking was low on her list of things she liked to do, she did all the rest. Once I got married and had my own kitchen, I taught myself to cook whatever we were going to eat. I had the impression I ought to serve meat twice a day, and because I was on a rather meager budget, we ate a lot of hot dogs.

These many years later I still do enjoy cooking, although I do not feel I must serve meat twice a day. Perish the thought! Protein twice a day, when you have diabetes, as I do, however is important and a rule I do try to follow. Besides meat and fish, this can include nut butters, cheese, cottage cheese, eggs, and other forms of protein. I don’t make many elaborate meals, because at eighty-seven my stamina is not what it once was. However, I do try for us to have mostly healthy, Mediterranean style dishes and lots of fish.

I have learned that certain tools are essential to efficient, enjoyable cooking. I have several different sized cutting boards, and my smallest is probably the one I use most. Two serrated knives, one large, one smaller and several small, pointed utility knives are helpful and better still, several pairs of scissors. Although I have a good chef’s knife for chopping, they are easier for me to use to deal with celery, scallions, and fresh herbs. I also use the scissors to reduce peppers and onion to smaller pieces once I’ve cut into them.

One of my most favorite tools is a canning funnel. It’s not that I do any canning, although my mother did. Our basement closet was once filled with glass jars of fruit and vegetables picked from her garden. Today the food I can purchase in the market is a lot more available and does not require standing over a hot stove. My canning funnel as well as its traditional sister, with the smaller spout, is absolutely invaluable for pouring soups, stews, cooked fruit, and anything liquid into jars without spilling.

I once had plastic funnels and somewhere along the way I acquired stainless steel ones. I highly recommend these as one of the most valuable tools in a kitchen. A good, versatile garlic press is also vital if you use much of this nutritious vegetable or herb, depending on what you call it. My lemon squeezer is another big help for our daily before breakfast half a lemon in water liver cleanse. Slotted spoons and several sizes of ladles are helpful. Lastly, I have two smaller and one larger spatula.  These small ones are extremely handy for all sorts of cooking, and the larger one is useful too, for serving.

May you have success with your efforts in cooking, and enjoy it.

Blessings and best regards, Tasha Halpert

PS Do you have some kitchen tools you are especially fond of? Please email me or comment and share your story. I so enjoy hearing from readers. Thanks! 

Heartwings Love Notes 1098 Where Can It Be

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Heartwings says, “Putting things back where they belong is important.”

As a child I was taught to be tidy. Emily, the practical nurse my parents hired to help care for me when I was around two or so, tried hard to make sure I learned to put my toys, and later, my clothing away. She was with us until I was around eight years old when she left to get married and have a family of her own. Unlike my mother, she was patient and physically affectionate.

I am not faulting my mother in any way. Her behavior was molded by her upbringing. While kind and a good mother, she grew up with strict German parents who did not encourage demonstrative behavior. Even as a grandmother she was reluctant to accept or to give physical affection. Fun and fond behavior was not a priority, neatness was. 

Once I was married and had children of my own, I did my best to be as tidy as I could. This grew more difficult with each addition to the family, which eventually added up to five children. I didn’t have a lot of time to devote to being neat or organized. My mother often criticized me for my “messy house,” and it never seemed to occur to her that there was a good reason for this. I thought it was more important to enjoy and care for my children than to be neat.

Neatness does have virtues beyond looking nice. Having things in order means when I need to find something, I’ll know where it is and can find it without any difficulty. That is why the saying, “a place for everything and everything in its place,” has been my guideline as long as I can remember. For instance, I try hard to keep all of my tools where I can easily reach them and as close as possible to where they will be used. Being a systematic Scorpio, I have sectioned off the shelves in my pantry by assigning them to what I can make or do with the contents.

However, unfortunately this works as long as I am the only person putting things away. Also, there often is more to be put away than the shelves can conveniently hold. This results in items get shoved to the back, effectively disappearing from view and becoming unavailable. So, although I no longer have little children to run around after or an eagle-eyed mother judging my attempts to be tidy, I struggle still with my tidiness conundrums.

The current state of my health doesn’t help either. Despite Stephen’s great help, much does not get done. There are days I simply only have enough energy to cook meals and see to my immediate emails, not to mention attend doctors’ appointments. Prioritizing becomes important, and as it was once so it is again: I do what is important and let the rest go.

Reaching and Grasping

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Heartwings says, “It is very helpful for one’s reach not to exceed one’s grasp.”

Reaching for things is somewhat more challenging for me than it used to be. I am often faced with the need to ask for help. Fortunately, Stephen is usually available, and though he has also shrunk, at least he is much taller than I am.  Sadly, I have diminished from five feet four inches to five feet one and a half or maybe two. In addition, I have lost flexibility. Asking for help is getting more necessary, and I am getting more used to doing that. It seems there is always more to be learned.

In a yoga class and lecture that I attended many years ago now—yet somehow it seems just a year or two have past, the visiting sage told us this. “My mantra is I know nothing; I want to learn.” I balked at first at the seemingly negative affirmation. Affirming I know nothing? That didn’t sound right. But affirming I wanted to learn, did. So, I gave the whole sentence some thought.

Eventually, light descended upon my brain, and I finally understood. This sentence describes what is called Beginners Mind. What that means is that at the beginning I expect to learn, so it is important not to cloud the mind with what I think I might know. When I think I know something, my mind does not generally seek more information.

If I think I have grasped whatever it is I need to learn, I most probably will no longer reach out further with my mind. It is more important than you might think for your grasp to exceed your reach. Because there is always more to be learned, whether it is the how-to of a project, the pitfalls, or else the simple understanding or a further interpretation of what something might mean. We cannot always know how much more there is to know. 

When I look at each day with a beginner’s mind attitude, there are wonderful conundrums that arise. They give me something to think about other than the dismayingly negative tales of misbehavior that often comprise the daily doings of the world at large. The arguments and disagreements people have that stoke violence could so often be resolved by a better understanding or even a simple agreement to disagree.

For me the world I live in is filled with interesting experiences to be explored with discoveries to be made along the way. Perhaps because I am a poet, I especially delight in finding beauty that has simply created itself. The lovely weeds right now along the roads, waving in the breezes from passing cars, are a delight to be seen. The delicate Queen Ann’s lace, mingled with the tall, graceful Artemesia are probably destined eventually to be cut down, yet each day they remain, they fill the eye that gazes upon them with their beauty. I am grateful to be able to see them and to find something so special within my grasp.

May you be able to look upon life with a beginner’s mind.

Blessings and best regards, Tasha

PS Do you have comments, questions, or stories to share? I would love to hear from you, and I find great joy in your correspondence.

Heartwings Love Notes 1096: Memory and Forgettery

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Heartwings says, “Remembrance of things past can be precious.”

Lately my forgettery works better than my memory, or so it seems to me. I shudder to think old age is creeping up on me, however that might be the case. At eighty-seven going on eighty-eight maybe it’s appropriate to have some memory issues. The thing is, I have said for years if I must Lose out either in mind or in body, I’d prefer to keep my mind.

My mother was physically strong even into her nineties. She once fell down a flight of stairs and got to her feet with nothing to show for the experience but a few bruises. She was physically active in her old age, and unlike me, she could go for long walks at a fast pace. Her mind, however began to leave her in her mid-seventies and by the time she was my age she had become more absent of mind than not.

My grandmother on my father’s side was strong and vital until age eighty, when she fell asleep the night of the lovely Christmas party she had for us, and never woke up. She was found the next morning, where she had dozed off sitting against her pillows. She was reading the book the children’s father and I had given her for Christmas and never woke up. What a lovely way to go. I would like to be that fortunate.

She had a youthful demeanor, and by sales people and other strangers, when I was with her, she was often thought of as my mother. I like to think I’ve inherited her good health and her mental resilience. She might have been somewhat forgetful. I remember my mother once saying that when she stayed with her, my mother was always stepping on the notes to herself that my grandmother left on the floor. I prefer to leave my notes on my desk or on the kitchen counter. I have two pads of recycled paper I keep in different places to help me remember to do things that I need to do in a timely manner.

In some way, it appears to me that I am more apt to neglect what I do not write down. So, lately I am taking care to write even more down than I used to. I also write down stray hints and phrases that are themes for columns. These float in and as quickly float away if I don’t make note of them. Today’s subject is an example of a quick inspiration based the word “forgettery.”

My long-term memory is excellent and goes back to my very early childhood. I have impressions from being in my blue highchair and even in my blue crib. I was so good at escaping from it that my parents moved my bureau up against it to prevent me. I hope my memory continues to hold up and that my forgettery will not increase, however, only time will tell, and time’s not saying right now.

May you remember whatever you need to, by the time you do.

Blessings and best regards, Tasha Halpert

PS How about you, dear Readers? Do you have memory tricks you use or other methods that are helpful? I love it when you share, and I treasure your responses. Thanks in advance.

Heartwings Love Notes 1095 Whatever Happened to Elbow Grease

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Heartwings says: “There’s lots to be said for elbow grease.”

I was chatting with a friend of mine who is an energetic cleaner. “You don’t use any cleaning products with chlorine?” She asked me.  “How do you get things clean? No harsh chemicals? No oven cleaners?”

I know she can scrub endlessly away at something until it sparkles, and she thinks I’m a bit strange because of the products I use. I pointed out to her that vinegar, baking soda and salt can clean almost everything and result in no harm to the environment.

“Then you’ve got to scrub so hard to make them work,” she complained.

“Whatever happened to elbow grease?” I asked her with a laugh. “You go to a gym and pay money to exercise. When I do my housework, I get many of the same benefits.” She shook her head and changed the subject. I smiled to myself and thought about the money I save by not purchasing expensive, harsh, ill smelling, cleaning products. I use things I find right on my pantry shelves, plus a select few I buy at my market.

If you prefer commercial products, you can purchase environmentally sound cleaning products at your health food store and these days at some enlightened supermarkets. There are a few more that are available everywhere and legitimately good for the environment, like Murphy’s Oil Soap which smells wonderful and harms nothing, and good old Bon Ami—hasn’t scratched yet. I also discovered a little baking soda and a bit of scrubbing do away with tea stains in my mugs. Vinegar cleans the toilet and kills germs. It stays clean longer too. Pour vinegar and sprinkle with baking soda on your oven floor. Leave over night and wipe up for a clean oven in the morning.

I don’t mind a little extra scrubbing. I am beginning to see all housework as a form of benevolent exercise. Apparently, I am not alone in my thinking as I recently read something to the effect that those who analyze such things now include time spent cleaning and scrubbing as a valid form of exercise. This is good news for those of us who once thought housework was a necessary evil. Now it can serve two purposes and become a necessary good. Those who are pressed for time who have children at home might persuade them of the virtues of washing the floors as an alternative to tedious soccer practice. Although I’m pretty sure that to most children over the age of eight, almost anything is preferable to housework,

Along with Bon Ami, keep a shaker of baking soda on the edge of your sink and use them instead of an ill smelling scouring powder. Try sprinkling baking soda on your rugs overnight and vacuuming it up in the morning. You’ll be surprised how clean things will smell. And remember, elbow grease is not only free, it reduces calories and trims the arms and chest as well. Powerful stuff, elbow grease!

Hope you have a good supply!

Blessings and best regards, Tasha Halpert

PS Do you have any good cleaning tips or suggestions? It is such a treat to hear from readers. Thanks in advance for your thoughts.

Heartwings Love Notes 1094 Dealing with Small Nuisances

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Heartwings says, “What can’t be cured must be endured.”

There is a saying, “nibbled to death by ducks,” that aptly describes what I am writing about: the small but frequently encountered annoyances we all experience. For instance, those envelopes businesses send out to put your checks, together with a portion of the bill, inside. The bill payment piece of paper must be put in right side up with the address facing outward. The check, behind it, is best put facing in to obscure the amount from prying eyes.

I wish I had a dollar for every time I have messed this up. Sometimes the address ends up in the wrong place, and I must cut the envelope open, fix my mistake, then reseal it with scotch tape. Occasionally I seal the envelope and then discover I neglected to put in the check and must redo as above. You might suggest I pay with a deduction from my bank account. However, I don’t like to make my bank information that public. There are too many horror stories about stolen lists to allow me to feel comfortable doing that.

How about the cotton in pill bottles? Can you pry it out whole? Or does it shred in your fingers as you try to extract it, the way it does in mine? My solution is first, great delicacy and patience; failing that, I employ a pair of tweezers, or perhaps small tongs, and again, patience. I also try to find a use for the cotton and have so far discovered it can be used with silver polish to shine small objects or jewelry. It can also be used for other cleaning chores, and I seldom throw it out.

Then there are the spam calls. We have a program on our phone that catches and stops them after one ring. This is helpful. The ones that do get through fall into two main categories: sales or charity appeals. Depending on my mood, I can be polite with the latter: standard response, “We do not contribute from the phone, please send something in the mail,” or simply,” please take me off your list.” Intrusive sales people might get a teasing response or a flat “no,” and take me off your list or I’ll report you. Stephen has fun when he wants to. Recently, he told a person selling burial insurance he’s going to be stuffed and has already made arrangements with the taxidermist, or he might ask the person selling something for a date.

Coping with these incidents can be an annoyance. I have a number of friends who, because they hope to avoid these calls no longer have a home phone. Yet spam comes on cell phones too. I prefer talking on my home phone. It doesn’t get hot or drop calls. Besides it can be fun to tease the people who are earning a salary this way. Most appear to be foreign, so perhaps this job is important for them. As far as machines go, they usually hang up sooner anyway. I consider these experiences as a form of patience training, and let it go at that. 

May you be able to handle your nuisances with ease,

Blessings and best regards, Tasha Halpert

PS I do so enjoy hearing from readers, write to me with suggestions, questions, and always, tales of your experience. 

Heartwings Love Note 1093 The Kindness of Strangers

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Heartwings says, “When you look with kind eyes, it helps you to be kinder.”

Recently, I sat in a movie theater for nearly three hours. When the film ended, I stood up to find the restroom. While there were some railings near my seat, as I headed for the exit corridor, there was only a wall to help me steady my steps. My balance was challenged even as I used my cane. “Let me help you,” came a voice next to me. “Take my arm.” A short, kindly woman extended her arm to me.

She walked down the long corridor with me, at the rate of my slow steps very patiently, until we reached a ladies’ room. Only it was not the usual one but a special locked family room. Again, she waited with me as an attendant fetched a key and let me in. I kept thanking her. Every time I said how grateful I was, she shook her head and dismissed my words. When I came out, she was gone. My husband told me she had waited to tell him where I was. Sadly, I never learned her name.

The Dalai Lama tells us his religion is kindness. Focused in this way, kindness becomes a way to practice one’s spirituality. Of course, this is not confined to Buddhism. Christianity’s Jesus tells us to “Do unto others,” and other religious and spiritual paths have their versions of this kind of behavior as well. For most of my life, I have tried to practice kindness as often as possible.

The other day I was exiting a parking lot when a huge truck stopped in front of me, attempting to make a turn into the plaza across the street. After waiting for the cars to finish passing, it turned. There was a huge line of cars behind it, and I resigned myself to a long wait. But no, the person behind the truck waited for me to pull out and go. I gave her a big smile and a wave. What a blessing I received from that stranger on the road.

It’d one thing to be kind to those we love and cherish. It is to be hoped that we will give freely to dear friends and family. On the other hand, I was brought up to avoid strangers, to fear interaction with them, or at the least to be cautious around them. No one suggested being kind to them. I have never been inclined to follow this approach.

To be sure, being kind to strangers may or may not bring an immediate or any reward, yet that is not the reason to be doing it. Being kind is a good way to expand the heart and to build compassion. I have met with much kindness in my life and I have done my best to return it whenever I could as well as to initiate it. It costs little to nothing to be kind, and it adds to the sum of compassion in the world.

May you be as kind as you can be, always.

Blessings and best Regards, Tasha Halpert

Would you share a kindness from a stranger story with me? I so enjoy it when you share your stories. Comments and suggestions are welcome too.

Heartwings Love Notes 1092: Adjusting Expectations

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Heartwings says, “Dealing with our expectations takes lots of work.”

Expectations are tricky. They can make you think you’re falling behind, or create unrealistic goals that are impossible to fulfill. On the other hand, they can be guidelines or parameters that help us. How they function is up to us. While it is actually best to live without expectations, AKA: beginner’s mind—it is also almost  impossible to do so.

Our expectations of ourselves begin in infancy, when we struggle to our feet and take our first steps. However, at that time they are not conscious. They are also based on other people’s actions toward us. As we become aware of others and begin to interact, we expect the ball we throw or roll to be thrown or rolled back, and a world of actions and reactions begins to emerge for us.

Expectations are our attempts to learn for better or worse. They are built by experience. As young children we often learn how to make adults laugh or smile and thus treat us nicely. We also learn the reverse is true when we misbehave and make them angry. How well I remember wishing to read the newspaper during the day, yet refraining, knowing that my father wanted it pristine for his readership in the evening after work. No matter how carefully I refolded it, he would know, as I found out to my sorrow. But that was then.

Fast forward some eighty plus years into the future. I’ve had a whole lifetime of experience and of dealing with the expectations around which my life has revolved. Now, thanks to age and Parkinson’s, I am dealing with a whole new set of them, both positive and negative. Unexpectedly, all my previous experience has been superseded and I must deal with a whole lot of new parameters and limitations.

For instance, I’ve always been an independent, I’ll do it myself kind of person. Now I need help practically every time I turn around. I have difficulty opening jars or beating up eggs. It takes me a much longer time than it used to, to fix even the simplest meal. However, this is not said to complain or seek pity. The issue is one of having realistic expectations. Were I to do it the Zen way, I would have none at all. I would simply get out the ingredients for a meal and go to work on it.

Or I can learn to adjust my expectations to be content to proceed as skillfully as I can without being concerned. It’s true that I try to live without expectations, yet those niggly statements I grew up hearing—”You can do better” was a frequent one—tend to nip at me and must also be dealt with. I must talk back to them, assuring them I am doing my best, and that they can take it easy on me. Best of all, I must take it easy on me and remember not to have unrealistic expectations.

May you be able to fulfill most of your happy expectations.

Blessings and best Regards, Tasha Halpert

PS Do you wrestle with expectations? Do you have a few or lots? I so enjoy hearing from readers.

Heartwings Love Notes 1090: A Vegetable We Treat as a Fruit

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Heartwings says, ‘Spring rhubarb cooked with honey added is an amazing treat.”

By definition, a fruit is a plant’s seeds born within a fleshy enclosure. It must have seeds to be called a fruit. Conversely, a vegetable, by definition, does not bear seeds like that. Tomatoes and peas are technically fruits, though peas belong to another botanical branch. Rhubarb, which we treat like a fruit, is in fact a vegetable. However, it is not usually eaten with other vegetables, nor for most people, is it used to accompany meat, poultry, or fish.

Most people may not know how versatile rhubarb is. In addition to the many recipes to be found for desserts made with it, it can be made into a relish or a jam and eaten with anything from chicken or meat loaf to hot dogs. For that use it is prepared to be somewhat tart rather than sweet. My daughter in Vermont gives me wonderful jars of her rhubarb concoctions of this nature that we lovingly cherish every year.

My precious, ancient Fanny Farmer’s cook book has an interesting recipe for rhubarb fig marmalade, using rhubarb and dried figs, sugar and lemon, and another for rhubarb conserve. Here’s that recipe, which contains rhubarb, raisins, oranges, a lemon, and sugar. Cut up 4 pounds rhubarb, put in a large kettle with 4 or 5, your choice, pounds of sugar ((8 or 10 cups). Add a pound of raisins, the grated rind and juice of 2 oranges, and the grated rind and juice of a lemon. Mix well, cover, and let stand for half an hour. Bring to a boil and simmer for 45 minutes, stirring frequently. Cool and fill glass jars. Seal and store or freeze in small batches or as you please.

When we lived on Warren St. I had a neighbor who used to let me cut as much rhubarb as I wanted from his plants every spring and summer. I usually cooked it very simply in a double boiler without any added water, for about 40 minutes.

It needs no water—you might notice there is none in the compote. It has plenty of fluid contained in its stalks.  I would add honey to taste and keep it in the refrigerator to eat either for breakfast or as a dessert. It has the virtue of being an excellent mover of bowels.

I have also made it into a crisp or even an upside down cake. It combines wonderfully with strawberries as well, making a sauce or a pie, or a crisp. For the later combine 4 cups of all rhubarb or some strawberries and rhubarb, maybe half and half if you like, in an 8 inch square baking dish. Sprinkle the top with ½ cup butter, sugar, flour, and rolled oats each, combined into an even mixture.  (I use a food processor) Blend butter, sugar and flour first, add oats and blend briefly. Bake at 350 for 45 minutes, serve warm, cold or room temperature to 6 or 8 people.

May you enjoy rhubarb any way you like, and find it helpful to your health.

Blessings and Best Regards, Tasha Halpert

PS How do you like rhubarb? Have you prepared it yourself? Write and tell me, I so enjoy your emails. Tashahal@gmail.com is a good way to reach me. Check my blog on WordPress at http://tashasperspective.com.

Heartwings Love Notes 1091: Birthdays are Timely Occasions

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Heartwings says, “Years can seem like weeks when memories cluster together.”

Our country has been celebrating its birthday on July fourth for quite a long time now. In three more years, it will be the two hundred and fiftieth birthday of the United States of America. While the first celebration was actually in 1777, it took time to catch on, and catch on it did. In the 1800s celebrations were widespread. Now, of course it is common and even commercialized.

The time passes so quickly now, it was only a few years ago that we celebrated the two hundredth, or so it seems to me.  For me, that holiday has always been filled with memories. I recall the wonderful parades that marched past our home in the town in Massachusetts where the children’s father and I raised our family. I have happy memories of the occasion as one for a gathering of townspeople later that day in the afternoon, with games and races for all ages.

My children participated in all the events and often won them, being well coordinated and athletic, unlike their mother. Unfortunately for me they always insisted I run in the tired mothers’ race—as it was called. Never having been much of a runner, I almost always came in last, but they were proud of me anyway. There was a children’s parade as well, and of course costumes to be cobbled together and happy faces as my family marched with the other children.

I remember as a youngster attending the fireworks held at the beach in her town, with my grandmother. We sat on the sand, watching the set pieces that had been attached to a wooden pier that jutted out into the water. It was a special and cherished experience. Nowadays I usually watch the fireworks on television listening to music. When I lived in Virginia, together with friends and a few thousand others, I got to see the fireworks over the Capitol—a most remarkable display.

Because Stephen’s birthday falls the day before on the third, we celebrate for several days, including the fifth, which is our wedding anniversary. We usually have a party with friends and when we had our inner peace center, we often had some who came from afar and tented in the back yard. July fourth has been a special day for me for as long as I can remember.

As we get older, the years seem to go by faster and faster. While this is surely an illusion, it is a very real experience. The celebrations of memory, with my children in costumes, parading along with others, seem just a few moments from my time with my grandmother and a few more from the parties we called Three Days of Peace and Love—July 3, 4, and 5, with tents on the lawn. Presently, our celebrations of these special days are quieter, and we will not be seeing live fireworks, however they will be just as special as they have always been, in their own way.

May you enjoy your celebration with those you love.

Blessings and Best Regards, Tasha Halpert

P.S. How do you celebrate the Fourth? Share with me if you like, I so enjoy the stories you do. Write me at tashahal@gmail.com.